Jigsaw of my home life and introduction to MBE.

Putting the pieces together to prepare for next week. A medium to hard difficulty level.

I struggle with chronic scatterbrainedness. I struggle with anxiety. I struggle with being a Virgo, really. As silly as that may sound to someone who pays no mind to the workings of astrology…

Regardless, the description of a Virgo on any little horoscope website is surprisingly accurate. I could definitely use one of those descripts as content for my “About Me” rather than a list, or something lame like that.

Back to what I was saying, Monday school begins. I mentioned in a previous post that I am an engineering student and the work load for that is no where near light or feathery or cloudlike or bubbly. Nooooope. Fortunately, I go back Tuesday because I lucked out on my schedule and I only have class Tuesday and Thursday.

The part that sucks is I have to get that damn window replaced Monday. In another state. In the cold. You can see a photo of my window in my “Elsa needs to get out” post.

This whole weekend I have been trying to clean my house. I left this place for a month and didn’t clean one thing before I left. In my defense, I didn’t plan on being gone an entire month. But yeah, poor decision on my part…Though I made lots of money doing holiday nails for all my clients down South. Merry Christmas to me.

So yeah…the house was as messy as I left it. I am handling it one bedroom at a time. I KEEP GETTING DISTRACTED. I will start folding laundry but then mid fold of a T-shirt I will get up and turn on the dishwasher, then vacuum 1/4 of the living room, stop, text, change my current playlist from gangsta rap back to Adventure Club, lose the shirt I was folding, go to look for it upstairs, pee while upstairs, my son will ask me a question so I sit and talk to him, watch 45 minutes of Independence Day on my new Gear VR(virtual reality system), and then blank out.

This is the norm for me. I absolutely hate it. But this is my progress so far today.


Mister Daren’s room. I also folded all of his laundry. This is quite the accomplishment.


Now it is Monday. I sorta saved half of the post and wrote two days in one. Today I got my shattered passenger side window replaced. The men at Safelite tried to shoo me away when I got there.


I have an appointment for 11 o’clock. I drove an hour. My window is shattered to a trillion and sixty-seven pieces. You sent me an email this morning to confirm this arrangement.

Safelite man 1: Ma’am your window isn’t here yet.
Me: Wut?
Safelite man 1: I tried to call you this morning isn’t your number this number that definitely isn’t yours?
Me: That is definitely not my number.

There was a Safelite man 2. He was playing an acoustic guitar when I got there.

Wut? Why?

He was the most reasonable. He called up the warehouse and found out that the truck with my window in it was on it’s way…literally got there within minutes of him calling.

So yeah skipping all the strange Twilight Zone details that followed in this Safelite facility, my window is all good.

On the way out I stopped at some random state park and took a photo with my S7. This has no editing whatsoever.


It’s impressive. All the photos I use for my headers on my blog I have taken with the iPhone 6S camera and did a lot more editing to get them where I wanted them to be. The S7 really captures the moment perfectly or close to it.


So while I was driving, I thought about MBE. (Mister Blue Eyes) I mentioned him in a previous post.

Okay. I am unreasonable when it comes to just mere thoughts of him. I am convinced that I have this connection to him. Please bear with me. I know how all of this sounds. I know how ridiculous it is. I never get like this…only with MBE. Seriously I barely have a heart.

Anyways. This connection. I feel it always. It is this feeling of knowing I have. MBE is married now. He recently had a new child. I haven’t seen or spoken to him in a couple years. The last thing I ever said to him was this.

20170109_211332This. I hate to admit…this is an Instagram Direct Message.

Like I slid into his DM. I slide into no one’s DM unless I am sharing one of the many memes that I relate to, or if I sharing one of the many memes I relate to. And then sometimes I slide in there if I am sharing one of the many memes I relate to.

He ignored it. Never read it. Whatever.I sent it 48 weeks ago. If I did my math correctly, that is about a year ago. That was the last time I ever attempted to speak to him and before that single DM, it was going on two years since we spoke.

I am unreasonable with him. I repeat it over and over in my head. If he knew how I felt, he wouldn’t understand why I felt as strongly as I do for him. We barely dated three months. We hardly saw each other. We were neighbors for less than a year. I don’t have a strong foundation to even feel “in love” with him. Especially when I have been with guys that are gorgeous or have a great career…but CLICHECLICHECLICHE. That shit doesn’t matter. It’s how they make you feel when they are around you.

I yearn for the feelings I had when I was his neighbor, being creepy on my balcony.(when I first met him) I swear I watered my Bird of Paradise plant 43 times a day just to catch him walking to his car. Poor plant drowned. RIP. Or when I started running at 4:30 in the morning just to be able to run by as he was leaving for work. I don’t feel like I could replicate these feelings with someone else.

We met in the weirdest way.

I moved into a really nice apartment complex. One day, I ran into my sister there. She is all over the universe at all times so it was weird to see her. She informs me that she has been hanging out with one of her friends from high school, H who has an older slothy looking sister that has an ex husband that lives in the same complex. You follow? The ex husband is MBE.

Sloth and MBE have a cute little boy together, the same age as Daren. So Sloth would still visit MBE for fam time and she would bring her little sister and my sister over there with her. Hence, why I ran into my sis randomly there. I thought nothing of anything. My son met him way before I did because they brought him over to play with his cute son.

I was lonely at the time. Drinking my nights away after Mister Daren went to sleep. I was being all weird with Frat Face/best friend. Going out again. Dipping my toes into the single life. Well H, with the Sloth sister who used to be married to MBE, was dating one of my best friends. I know there are so many webs. I swear I have killed Charlotte since this. Everyone would come stay at my apartment as squatters. It was cool. I liked it. I was never alone. They would help with Daren. We were like a fun family.

One day they decided to try and hook MBE up with me. So they strategically decided to bring MBE’s cute boy aka H’s nephew, over to play with Daren while I was at work. They made sure MBE didn’t pick him up until I got home from work. They bombed me with him. When I met him for the first time, I did not think he was shit. Really. Not anything. He was too skinny for me. Seemed lame. I wasn’t impressed. He thought I was hot. I mean I was 15 pounds heavier then so these days I feel flattered when I think about it. I knew he wanted to get in my pants. Whatever he is a male. Anyways I thought nothing of him.

One day I found out my sister was having her boyfriend over while she was babysitting and not letting me know. Naturally I was angry. So then I thought, lemme ask neighbor guy to check up on her from time to time. So I texted him and asked if he would do this for me randomly while I was work. 10 minutes later a knock at my door.

He thought I wanted him to check on her that day, but I was already home. So there he is. Eyes darting around the room, looking all confused to see me open the door. In that moment, I thought to myself “Oh shit. His eyes are so pretty and blue.”

…to be continued cause I am tired AF and I start class in the morning…






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